They start out all cute and All-American until after the wedding, then it's like cookies, couch and coach purses. In the military community, especially the online military community, dependapotamus is a 4-letter word. Listen to them call you a dependa as your depression takes over or you have a kid and cant get a job. But you have years of experience and knowledge regarding those problems. Learn more in the Cambridge English-Spanish Dictionary. if their soldier is a officer, the Dependa-twat thinks that everyone has to respect and salute them too by Bishop2014 February 02, 2015 I would not change my life decisions just to keep from being labeled by ignorant people. Once they have married them, they immediatly take credit for all things that their spouse has accomplished. They often target unsuspecting military members to be their paycheck, I mean husband. Dictionary. Traduções principais: Inglês: Português: depend⇒ vi intransitive verb: Verb not taking a direct object--for example, "She jokes." Is it kind? See more. The English for dependa is depend. depend definition: used to say that you are not certain about something because other things affect your answer: . He gets to enjoy all the things the Marines are missing, more specifically the Marine's girlfriend back at home while the Marine is away on active duty. Tell a friend. "We've been in the military for blank years..", "We'll be promoted next month", "We've been to Iraq twice." But please don’t carry on the terrible tradition of mocking other military spouses! I hate the term and get frustrated any time the military spouse community decides to attack each other rather than build each other up. I’d gladly chose that over the Military Spouse Judgey Clique! We need more spouses to speak up when things are not up to code (like in our housing units–lead in the water in Germany and the US on posts for example). Why you gotta use “she” and “her”? Step 6. WARNING: Dependasauruses can be dangerous. Is it fair? 316. Absolutely we need spouses to speak up when there are problems! I’m not sure I understand this – apparently you will be told other girls (using your own reference to being ‘the girl’ earlier) you cannot be thankful for Tricare and discounts. … You will most likely be alone for months but try to avoid TV dinners. Crossposted by 15 days ago. The best friends and best well intentioned people. Pronunciation. They often target unsuspecting military members to be their paycheck, I mean husband. Step 4. It makes you look bad, it’s embarrassing for your spouse for you to be acting like that. أفعال مركّبيّة: الإنجليزية: العربية: depend on [sth], depend upon [sth] vtr phrasal insep phrasal verb, transitive, inseparable: Verb with adverb(s) or preposition(s), having special meaning, not divisible--for example,"go with" [=combine nicely]: "Those red shoes don't go with my dress." I think we all deserve better than that– new and seasoned spouses alike! Step 3. save. I’ve never heard a dude called a dependa, even if he was a dependent. Somehow have all of your items broken (what?). Listen to the military leadership tell your husband that your marriage and spouse are worthless because it wont last, even though you gave up your family, career and any lasting friendships. The term dependa is offensive and giving people advice as to how not to be labeled as one is perpetuating bullying behavior by legitimizing the term. When you rely … Learn more. Do your best to involve yourself in social activities and groups. Depend definition: If you say that one thing depends on another, you mean that the first thing will be... | Meaning, pronunciation, translations and examples Every military spouse is a dependent (unless they are active duty), but to be a dependa infers that someone is useless or stupid. depend - Online English-Portuguese dictionary. I think there needs to be a list, so we can all agree on unacceptable dependa behavior. Click To Tweet. Repeat step 4. Try not to be overdramatic. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. 9 comments. In the Marines, a "Jody" is a generalized term meaning: any man who stays home while everyone else goes to war. I wrote this for new young spouses who may experience online bullying and not know why they were being mocked. I agree with you. On a case-by-case basis, as with people not involved in the military, get bullied and deal with it appropriately. It screams entitlement which is what most spouses and the general military community gripe with you about: your entitlement. But if you can avoid these major offenses in the military spouse community, then you should be able to make it through without being labeled a dependa. Yes she outranks me. “Dependas” are real and I’ve had to deal with them on many occasions. If you have a career (which usually means skills and experience – not just a ‘job’ you can drop anywhere) then it’s entirely possible to vary your career across locations and contexts. Please stop putting other military spouses down based on some subjective set of behaviors you and others deem off-putting–like speaking up about bad housing, services, or health care. Learn more in the Cambridge English-Italian Dictionary. May be called a dependa depending on your behaviour. Or when there is only ONE adult psychiatrist for a returning group of 3000 soldiers from a 15 month deployment. The author is trying to help younger individuals avoid becoming a problem or issue. Your husband is gone for months, you sit with a tv dinner and watch the months pass. Unfortunately, this happens all too often, people get laughed at or mocked for it, and then they are afraid to speak up in future situations. Learn more. Dependa A person who is married to someone in the service who doesn't just depend on their spouse for financial support, but pretty much relies on them for it. It is only by advocating for the community that we will ever be able to bring about meaningful change. ‘Dependa’ is a horrible insult mainly used by military spouses to put each other down. Dependa is a conjugated form of the verb depender. You will be told that you are worthless in some way because you did not sign the paper to join, you have uprooted your whole life for their cause and again and again you will be told that you are no one and the military tells you that if your husband abandons you in this world after what you gave up, they do not care. If you suffer from poor mental health, look for appropriate support. Lose your right to post online. There are situations (like the ones you mentioned) where it is important to speak up and advance a concern. Guess that online posting rule didn’t stick lol. el doctor, la doctora). Have all of your items broken, damaged… you literally have nothing else.. but now you don’t have anything you own either, Step 8. Step 2. WE need more informed and vocal spouses and fewer messages to keep our heads down and our mouths shut. Break any of these rules and you can become the brunt of jokes on large Facebook pages. Usually they are imagined as a very lazy, annoying, fat person. There are other translations for this conjugation. Step 8. Depending upon your child's weight and height, she or he may have to sit in the back seat of the car. Other spouses are just as miserable and they will bully you too, especially if one of them manages to find the unicorn in the job world and doesnt have to stay home with the child. masculine or feminine noun. Just live your life and be you. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Step 9. Apparently, there are unspoken rules in the military spouse community about what makes someone a dependa. ‘It is very evident that the rigour with which merger control is enforced depends in part on the agenda of the Minister.’ ‘The investment return depends solely on the difference between what you paid and what someone else pays you when you sell.’ I think that’s good advice! A: Dear feeling hurt, The term “dependa” or “dependapotamos” is, unfortunately, a fairly well-known derogatory term within the military community. 1. Maybe the Male version would be dependo. Get support and encouragement for military life, right to your inbox. Step 1. To depend is defined as to be influenced by or to rely on. depend translations: . First-person singular present subjunctive form of depender. They defend themselves with their prickly. Never be able to get a decent career again because places dont want to hire or promote the girl who will just move anyway, Step 3. Step 5. Enough with the “dependapotamus” label! I can’t promise that this will make the name-calling go away. Step 1. ", A spouse of a military service person who has let himself or herself go, usually during a deployment. It may not be easy given your chosen career path, i.e. It sounds like you are confident and comfortable in your own skin. Phrases. Dependa - Urban Dictionary Definition Like us on Facebook! Dependasaurus A gossipy, loud mouthed, jobless woman who is a dependent of her unhappily married husband. This creature can be seen in it's natural state normally in the Post or Base Exchange, usually in the food court area. They are often seen at the commissary pushing a cart full of screaming children and Little Debbie Snack Cakes while wearing last night’s pajamas. by Lizann | Mar 24, 2017 | Memes and Military Humor, Military Life, New Military Spouse | 14 comments. depend meaning: 1. to be decided by or to change according to the stated thing: 2. it is not decided yet: 3. to…. Like a highschool game. Formal second-person singular imperative form of … Most spouses at this point have depression, anxiety and are now seeing therapists where they never had to before. They enjoy driving their minivans or company car around with their husband's position title on the windshield because they command the same respect that their husbands get. However, this article was focused more on brand new spouses, and was encouraging them to learn more about military life and find out what is “normal” before over-reacting to something, going straight to the unit leadership, or causing a scene. I’ve never heard of such a thing, but now I’m asking myself aren’t all of the military people grown adults? Anything you post, your husbands leadership sees and that makes your home life that much tougher, Step 11. Step 9. In the old world, it was expected that the woman would stay with the kids and pay was acceptable for that, in this new world, without the upgrades and help of the military.. you are expected to work… but the problem lies in the fact that you are expected to do this while you have no one to watch the soldiers kids.. the moment your husband deploys.. goodbye again to work.. because childcare will cost more than you make…then if you don’t have a job.. you are a dependa and you will barely scrape by. Step 7. Step 11. Pin Tweet Shop the Meme. Just stop it. As a Dependa I am applaud!! A military spouse who feels like her service member isn’t getting “the housing he deserves” or is being made to work too many hours might not want to complain directly to unit leadership before first learning more about the problem. The reason that they're called Jody specifically dates back to black soldiers in WWII. "Dependent" is the dominant form in American English for both the noun and adjective, while in British English, "dependant" is more common for the noun. Solitude. A gossipy, loud mouthed, jobless woman who is a dependent of her unhappily married husband. The Giant List of Deployment Resources for Military Families, Pre-Deployment Checklist for Military Spouses, 17 Unusual Things Military Families Get Free, How to send a care package overseas with free materials. So I think it’s only fair to discuss the rules. Dependa, also known as Dependapotamus, is a pejorative referring to the wives of military service people who live off of their spouse's earnings and are typically associated with being lazy and overweight. Stop it. LMAO I’m retired and my wife’s still active. English Language Learners Definition of depend informal —used in speech in phrases like it depends and that depends to say that the answer to a question will be different in different situations See the full … But not all young spouses have that inner strength. Every military spouse is a dependent (unless they are active duty), but to be a. What is a dependa? If you actually havea ‘career’ and you’re skilled, you will be able to maintain a career. All the outcast dependas are the “real” people. For your viewing pleasure, here it is. You have to know the unwritten “rules” before you choose whether or not to follow them, right? What about a new wife who just married into the military– how is she supposed to know if she is crossing a line? Listen to your husband tell you that military leadership told them something? Don’t eat ‘tv dinners’, they have poor nutrition and you should somehow find the time to throw something better together (it’s really not hard – you can have a nice home-cooked meal for one from start to finish in 30 minutes). Sooner or later, you may find yourself on one of them. No. I agree, Sarah. Remember you are a worthless dependa who has no job, you deserve no special privileges and your husband will be told your marriage means nothing. –Sarah Murray, Phd, RN, veteran, and military spouse of 25 years and counting. Step 5. Some may see this as strengthening your career, given the work opportunities are there for you of course. Translation for 'to depend' in the free English-Polish dictionary and many other Polish translations. someone who depends on you for financial support, for example, a child or family member who cannot work: As she has no dependants, the experts agreed there was no need for Ms Dewsbury to have life … "He has arrived. I mean, how do I know I’m not a dependa? Learn how to cook food that is nice and easy. People are going to talk how they are going to talk. el dependiente, la dependienta (deh-pehn-dyehn-teh) This means that the noun can be masculine or feminine, depending on the gender of person it refers to (e.g. Thesaurus. Listen to other women who tell you that you cant look at the only positive to what you now call life (getting the priveledge to shop at the commissary, discounts and tricare)… you literally have nothing else…but do not by any means think you deserve to shop there… it doesn’t matter that you no longer get to have a life… even though you never signed anything, Step 7. The stamp's value depends on how rare it is. There aren’t too many careers that are location specific. These creatures seek to take advantage of the trusting nature of the more inexperienced Service Member by birthing live children to him, to establish a link that would be more work to be rid of than to simply keep. Step 10. "Dependent" is still used to indicate the adjective form in British English but its use in this form is uncommon. Well, because ‘dependa’ is a female term, probably left over from the days when most military spouses were females. It’s literally teaching you to avoid bad behavior classic of the dependa stereotype. Only dependas would be offended by this article. Once they have married them, they immediatly take credit for all things that their spouse has accomplished. This is a weird one, but okay. Find more Spanish words at wordhippo.com! Guardian style guide ^ 5. present subjunctive form of depender. There are entire Facebook pages dedicated to finding pictures and posts of military spouses and mocking them for being a dependa. dependent What we all are at least some point in our lives. Examples. Your email address will not be published. depend translations: contare su, dipendere da, dipendere da. You dependas are up in arms about this article because the shoe fits. Learn to conjugate depender. Be called a dependa after losing everything in your life for your husband and his career (family, friends, home, job). Share with a new spouse. Learn your place, you are insignificant. It carries an extremely negative connotation meant to demean and insult military spouses. I understand what you’re saying, but I don’t think those are quite the situations I was discussing in this article. A Dependapotamus, or Dependapotami (Plural), is the spouse of a military Service Member, whose symbiotic relationship is parasitic. Copyright 2020 Seasoned Spouse | Website Design By Syt Biz, What is a dependa? ": colloquial (be conditional, not yet decided): depender v int "Are you coming to the party tonight?" Previous: View Gallery Random Image: If you don’t already know, you may wonder what exactly is a dependa or dependapotomus? It’s counterproductive to creating a supportive environment for all military spouses. Try not to be controversial online if it will reflect poorly on those around you. dependa ho Military wife who stays at home Ith no job and complains that her husband is away on deployment and says she misses him, but bangs every Jody she can find Mary: "wow, I … Your own skin dependa is a female term, probably left over from the days when most military and. And wonder and wish you could join the programs dependa urban dictionary just for a returning group of soldiers! You coming to the party tonight? this for new young spouses who may experience online bullying and know... 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People not involved in the military spouse of 25 years and counting is a. Situations ( like the ones you mentioned ) where it is only by advocating for community. Please don ’ t promise that this will make the name-calling go.... To speak up and advance a concern military leadership told them something have to sit in the military community dependapotamus! Spouses alike coach purses and i ’ ve had to before taking a screenshot someone’s! Is still used to say that you are confident and comfortable in your own skin you rely … the 's... Somehow have all of your items broken ( what? ) community and.. Ones you mentioned ) where it is important to speak up and advance a concern ( be conditional not. ``, a spouse of a military service person who has let himself or herself go, usually a... Husbands leadership sees and that makes your home life that much tougher, 2! Crossing a line or issue a line to demean and insult military were. The military spouse is a 4-letter word has let himself or herself go, usually during a deployment gossipy loud! Little for their appearance couch and coach purses mouthed, jobless woman who is a female,. T think we need spouses to put each other down like cookies, couch and coach purses car. Them on many occasions are real and i ’ ve never heard dude!